Under the Oak

(Note: Sorry it has been so long since I updated! I’ve had back pain problems for several weeks and while I’ve had plenty of witty little things I could have posted, they didn’t seem an appropriate follow-up to the previous post (which, by the way, has been viewed 4 times as many times as anything I’ve ever posted about). The following is the bulletin article to appear in this weeks bulletin at church. I post it here because a) this desperately needs updating and b) I’m too lazy to write TWICE in one day.)

Is Your Tail Wagging?

Would not God discover this?
For he knows the secrets of the heart.

Psalm 44:21

My dog has quite a personality. Though he cannot speak, he is perfectly capable of communicating anger, affection, concern, happiness, grumpiness, etc. He has even been known to hold a grudge for a full day if I treat him unfairly! I have had “Fred” for almost two years and have grown pretty good at reading his facial expressions and body language. Those who have never owned a dog may think it strange that dogs are referred to as “man’s best friend,” but I’ve learned just how eerily human their personalities can be at times. However, there is one thing about Fred that is distinctly inhuman: He is completely incapable of hiding happiness.

When we humans are upset with someone or dislike something we express it in words, facial expressions, body language, etc. If the person we are upset with says something we like or does something to make us happy, we are capable of concealing our happiness in order to give the impression that we are still upset (How many dozens and dozens of roses have been met with this (non)reaction?!). Fred is incapable of such deception. He could be growling at me and literally about to bite my ankle, but if I merely said the word “park” his tail would start wagging uncontrollably. His face might say “I dislike this” but his tail says “I’m lovin’ it!”

Can you imagine how frustrating it would be if humans had been given such a ‘tell’? The ability to conceal our impulsive feelings is not just used for deception or manipulation. There are times when it would be tactless to fully express our emotion upon receiving some bit of information. Indeed, we are blessed to be able to control when and how we express our emotion.

That said, perhaps “man’s best friend” can serve as a reminder to us of an essential truth – you can hide nothing from Yahweh. No creature is hidden from His sight, but all are naked and exposed to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account (Heb 4:13). Over and over in the Scripture we are reminded that God not only sees the expression of our emotion but the source of it – the heart. The Lord “knows all hearts.”

Many times, this works to our advantage. There are times when we just do not know how to adequately express what we are feeling to the Lord. He knows. I’ve often heard it taught, based on Romans 8:26, that part of the Holy Spirit’s role is to ‘interpret’ the inward groanings of someone who prays to the Lord. I believe this is a misinterpretation of the passage since in the context it seems clear to me that the “groanings” in Romans 8:26 are the Spirit’s groaning rather than man’s, but we don’t need Romans 8:26 to know that our God can understand even our deepest emotions. We describe it as ‘inward groaning’ because it is frustrating not to be able to express the deep pain, hurt, joy, desire, etc. But He knows. He knows because He can see our “tail” – our heart. He knows our heart even better than we do! (1 John 3:20)

However, we should also be reminded that this same divine knowledge which gives us comfort when we want to express our emotions (but can’t find the words) also reveals our true emotions when we do not want God to know. We can hide nothing from Him – including our emotions. We may say with our mouth that we have no desire to participate in some particular sin, but does what the Lord sees in our heart correspond to that?

Consider this: When you decry the immorality which has flooded our culture, is your tail wagging? When you say that you want nothing to do with dishonesty, is your tail wagging? When you claim to look only to the word of God for authority and decry reliance upon human tradition, is your tail wagging? When you express your dislike for divisive men and silly controversies, is your tail wagging?

How ridiculous we would look had God given us actual tails which betrayed our true feelings!

How ridiculous we must look to God at times.

Realizing our naked exposure before the Lord, we must purify our hearts and renounce evil not only in our words and actions but in our very hearts such that we can join in the sentiment of the Psalmist in Psalm 139:23-24:

Search me, O God, and know my heart!
Try me and know my thoughts!
And see if there be any grievous way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting!

The Cult of Green strikes again! This time against soft toilet paper. Surely this crosses some sort of line.

“At what price softness?” said Tim Spring, chief executive of Marcal Manufacturing, a New Jersey paper maker that is trying to persuade customers to try 100 percent recycled paper. “Should I contribute to clear-cutting and deforestation because the big [marketing] machine has told me that softness is important?”

Listen pal, I can assure you it wasn’t a big machine that told me that softness was important.

You don’t want to know.

But despite environmentalists’ concerns, they say customers are unwavering in their desire for the softest paper possible.

Go figure.

Also in this article is probably the most timely set of editorial brackets I’ve seen in a while.

“That’s a segment [of consumers] that is quite demanding of products that are soft,” said James Malone, a spokesman for Georgia-Pacific. Sales figures seem to make that clear: Quilted Northern Ultra Plush, the three-ply stuff, sold 24 million packages in the past year, bringing in more than $144 million, according to the market research firm Information Resources Inc.

Meanwhile, a SURPRISING study has revealed that “quality” toilet paper is pretty stinkin’ high on people’s priority list (granted the study was done by the folks that make Quilted Northern Ultra Plush…but still…is anyone disputing the findings?)

At least I know what brand to buy now!

A large wall has been discovered in the vicinity of Jerusalem. It is thought to date back to the Canaanites.

Unfortunately, the writer of the article offers evidence that he isn’t reading his bible (surprise!).

The wall is believed to have been built by the Canaanites, an ancient pagan people who the Bible says inhabited Jerusalem and other parts of the Middle East before the advent of monotheism.

The bible says nothing of the sort. Monotheism (the belief in the existence of a single deity) had its advent before all other -theisms, according to the bible (i.e., Adam and Eve were not cave dwelling polytheists). That is the opposite of what modern sociological and anthropological scholars believe – that monotheism was produced as a sort of offshoot or even perversion of the “older” polytheism. Monotheism, we are led to believe, has its roots in…well…cave dwelling polytheists…with a bright idea…and FIRE…for the LORD!

But then it might ruffle feathers if the sentence were completed truthfully.

The wall is believed to have been built by the Canaanites, an ancient pagan people who the Bible says inhabited Jerusalem and other parts of the Middle East before the advent of monotheism Jews.

Biblica has announced that the NIV translation will be undergoing a revision over the next year or so. It will be interesting to see how this one comes out (the TNIV bombed hard).

Oh…and chew on this: These scholars feel that that NIV needs updated to “reflect modern usage and recent scholarship” even though it is only from 1978, yet so many brethren insist on using the KJV which was translated FOUR HUNDRED YEARS AGO or even the NKJV which, though more recent, still is based on essentially the same (limited) Greek texts that were used in 1611. Mind boggling.

So in the past week or so. . .

The great state of Minnesota has selected an actual clown as its representative in the Senate chamber. While I worry that the interests of Minnesotans will be poorly represented, I seriously doubt that the addition of said clown to the Senate could negatively effect the stellar reputation of that body. *cough*

Speaking of clowns…you may not have heard: Michael Jackson died!!!!!!!1 I was sitting in Barnes & Noble when I was accosted by the couple behind me who were receiving constant texts and emails to tell them that Jackson he died. I know its a generational thing, but seriously, people. Get over it. The man was a freak show either by choice or as a product of the twisted environment in which he lived. I feel for his children, but I don’t see why this should be in the news almost a week later.

No clown flavored post would be complete without another cunning strike by the Cult of Green, right? The House this week passed what amounts to a massive tax increase on energy consumption. The chances of it ever passing the Senate are slim, but the very fact that it passed the House scares me – especially now that we have a one-party government. It will “only” cost $150 per year, we are told. Turns out, its more like $1800…and by 2030 $6300 per year for an average family of four (actually, if the CBO is as wrong in their predictions of the cost of this bill as they were about prescription drug coverage, then the cost will be more like $150,000 per year per family). But it is NECESSARY in order to SAVE THE PLANET from IMMINENT DESTRUCTION. I wonder how much a double-decker taco from Taco Bell (which uses energy to produce flour, tortillas, beans, hot water, corn, beef, beef grinding, cheese production, lettuce, paper, and ink on top of the energy cost of the actual retail of said product) would cost in this green future that our politicians dream up. $59.99 Value Meals!!

Meanwhile, President Obama has sided with Chavez and the United Nations against Honduras. From everything I’ve read, the ousted president of Honduras was in direct violation of the constitution of that country. No wonder they got rid of him. And no wonder our government would jump to his defense.

The blazing heat has zapped whatever spirited blog posts I might otherwise have been coming up with this week, but as much as I hate the heat, I wish I was leaving for Jamaica on Friday.